The Small Family     

Well, upon turning two, Theo has reached a new milestone: He is TV-free. Well, at least on my watch--Chris may still employ it occasionally on his watch, which is fine with me. I just no longer have the patience. So let me explain this turn of events….

What is perhaps laughable about this is that there is a big controversy over children watching television before the age of two. And two seems to be the magic number: People who are staunchly against television viewing for babies always seem to say “children under two.” And so we always sort of wondered, “What do they do when their kids turn two? Do they suddenly go, ‘Okay, it’s a TV free-for-all now that you’re two!’?” Of course not, but you get the idea…two seems to be a magic number where it’s suddenly okay for children to watch a bit of TV. But here in the Small household, it’s exactly the opposite. Because when do we ever do anything by the book? ;-)

So anyway, there is much heated debate on this. Some people and groups are 100% against any television viewing for children under age two. Others don’t have a problem with it as long as it’s age-appropriate television. And many, like Chris and me, fall right in the middle--with an “everything in moderation” stance.

The truth is, in my ideal world, Theo would have a lovely, peaceful upbringing where we never had to turn on a TV for him. But then reality sets in, and in our case, we realized two things. One, as those of you who know Theo well have undoubtedly noticed, the kid never slows down. His energy level is amazing. And supposedly it is important for children to have some “downtime” each day where they’re playing quietly or somehow relaxing (as much as children ever relax, that is…I don’t know many toddlers who relax much!). For a long time, the only time Theo would slow down a bit was while watching Baby Einstein. Don’t get me wrong--he didn’t turn into a lethargic zombie. But he would sit quietly and watch, jabbering quietly to his stuffed animals every now and then and making the odd comment here and there. We figured this sort of relaxation probably did him some good--a chance to chill out for a bit.

The second thing we realized is that it’s hard to have two jobs and raise a child without additional childcare. We’ve gotten it down to a system, but it’s a challenge. Chris takes Theo from about 7:15 to 9 while I work. Then I take Theo from 9 to approximately 5 while Chris works (and I work during Theo’s 90-minute nap). Then Chris takes Theo from 5 to 7:30 or so while I work. Then I spend a bit more time with Theo before putting him to bed at 8. And then, with luck, we collapse after spending a precious little bit of time together. (Though lately we’ve both been working until midnight or 1am every night, which is rather ghastly. We’re walking zombies right now!) And so, letting Theo watch 30 minutes of TV a day was a real help--it gave me 30 minutes of work time so that, in theory, I wouldn’t have to work after Theo went to bed. (You’d be amazed by how much I’ve learned to accomplish in 30 short minutes! I think it’s a stay-at-home-parent talent that we develop. Or maybe just a parent talent in general…I can only speak for those who stay at home, since I haven’t tried working outside the home.)

So, we loved Baby Einstein. And Theo loved Baby Einstein. Until recently. Lately, he asks to watch his show (which we normally allowed him to watch at roughly the same time every morning, to make it part of his routine), but then when I put it on, he whines and fusses and sometimes outright screams and shrieks. Okay, I thought. Maybe he’s outgrowing Baby Einstein. Let’s try Sesame Street. He likes Elmo, right? Well, yes…but he doesn’t like watching Sesame Street. (Apparently Elmo is charming in books and on his computer program, but not on TV. He does have a horribly shrill voice, I’ll admit.) Okay, then let’s try Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Who doesn’t like Mickey and friends? Apparently Theo. Although he liked that video fine while we were at Disneyland, he now hates it. Okay, fine. Let’s try a LeapFrog alphabet-learning video. He loves LeapFrog toys, so maybe he’ll like the video. Strike four!

And so, I give up. Truthfully, I think Theo has a specific video in mind that he wants to watch, but he can’t tell me which one and I can’t figure out it. (I’ve tried a maximum of two each morning--I refuse to stand there and put in 10 DVDs while Mr. Theo decides which one suits his fancy.) So until he can tell me or show me which one he wants to see (and then actually watches it without screaming or whining constantly), I have declared that there shall be no more TV in Mr. Theo’s life.

Why have I given up? Because I have learned something about myself: I have pretty much zero tolerance for whining. I’ve learned a lot about myself in the past two years. I’ve learned that even though I’m not a very outwardly affectionate person, I love, love, love any affection my son is willing to give me. I’ve learned that I’m a good mama for a boy because I love to do rough-and-tumble boy stuff, and I don’t mind getting dirty. I’ve learned that I love little-boy ways of adventure and mischief. I’ve learned that I’m far more patient than I would’ve ever thought possible with a screaming baby (thank goodness that stage is over, though!). And, on the less positive side, I’ve learned that I have pretty much no tolerance for whining. So, if our beloved 30 minutes of TV a day brings whining…well, then it must come to an end. For now. Get back to me in a few months, when I may have decided to give it another try!

But anyway, you didn’t tune into our blog this week to read about this momentous (ha!) event in our household. So let’s talk about fun stuff! Theo’s birthday was Monday, which was so neat! Chris and I both had to work, but we didn’t let that stop us from celebrating in the afternoon/evening. Actually, Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Tom helped us out for that. They volunteered to come over Monday morning and spend a couple hours with Theo so Chris and I could both work, and what a godsend that was! I had a very busy day (a book to get off to the printer, among other things), so that two hours was much needed. Theo had great fun with his grandparents--he and Grandma Kathy painted a picture while Grandpa Tom built his new toy workbench, and I’m told many books were read as well. Later in the afternoon, Chris and I took Theo to the mall for some play-area time and some McDonald’s French fries (a guilty pleasure!). And in the evening, Theo opened his presents from us. His water table is a big hit--he and I have played out in the backyard with it several times, with Theo getting happily drenched. You’ll see a couple pictures of him playing with it this week.

A word about the picture of him drinking from its faucet. A few of you know this story, but many of you don’t. When Chris was a little boy, he apparently decided to drink out of a faucet at his house, and he somehow got his mouth stuck on it (the faucet wedged between his gums and his cheek in some weird way). His mom and a family friend had to somehow use a towel to wrench his head off the faucet. They then took him to the pediatrician, who said that in 20 years of practicing, he had never seen such a thing. And so, when I saw Theo trying to drink from the faucet, I had to snap a picture!

Wednesday morning Theo was a cranky fellow, so I decided we needed a change of scenery. So, we headed to an awesome park near Grandma Diane’s house, and we met up with her there. As I suspected, Theo’s mood improved dramatically at the park and upon seeing his grandma, and we were even able to go to Starbucks for mochas and muffins afterward. Funny story, though. Theo wasn’t the only one cranky on Wednesday. I was in a foul mood, too. Long story--just a lot of things going wrong at once. Nothing major, but just enough to put me in a very crabby mood. So as I was at the park, squatting down to put Theo’s shoes on, I was reflecting on how crappy the day was going. And right then, a bird shat on my head. Yes, my crappy day literally got crappier. I couldn’t even wash it out right away, since the park isn’t near our house. But my very kind Mom picked the offending gunk out of my hair once it dried…she’s a good egg, that one!

Friday is usually my all-day workday. (Chris doesn’t work on Fridays, so he takes Theo all day so I can get a solid chunk of work done.) It’s always a productive day for me, but I’m also usually pretty ready for a break by 5pm or so! So we decided to go over to Whole Foods for dinner and then stroll around the shopping center where it’s located. We like going to Whole Foods for dinner because they have a little play area where Theo can play while we eat in relative peace. (Theo generally runs over every now and then to share some food, but mostly he likes to play while we eat.) This time, he spent much of the time organizing the food on the play “store” shelves.  Chris said he took him to Whole Foods earlier in the week, and some older kids were doing that. Theo watched with great interest and apparently took it all in and decided to implement a similar strategy himself on Friday. It’s really neat to watch him learning things! Although it’s not always the best things—a little girl in our complex taught him how to throw tanbark (mulch, for you East Coast-ers!) at the park, and I’m still working to break him of that habit. Argh. But for the most part, it’s really neat to see what he picks up by watching other kids.

He actually is really into organizing things lately. The other day he was playing in our hallway and ran across a piece of Tupperware that had somehow ended up there. He stopped playing, picked it up, ran into the kitchen, and put it away in the Tupperware cupboard, then resumed playing back in the hallway. I was so impressed! Chris said he did the same thing with a pan earlier in the week. I recently read somewhere that three-year-olds generally go through an organizing stage where they like to sort things and put them in order, so perhaps he’s just entering that stage early. He is very much a fan of sorting laundry as well--he helps with that every time we do laundry. And putting away dishes--he always helps to unload the dishwasher, but lately he also puts things in the correct cupboards if they are cupboards he can reach.

After a week of lovely weather, the windy, icky weather came back on Saturday, so we decided some indoor fun was in order. We didn’t feel like staying home, so we drove down to the Children’s Museum in Stockton. Theo had a ball! It’s basically a big museum with all hands-on things for kids to play with. There are lots of different theme areas--some for older kids, but many great for kids Theo’s age.  This time, his favorite parts were driving the fire truck (yes, it’s a REAL fire truck!), playing in the little Victorian house (as he did last time, he spent much time arranging the dishes in the kitchen), exploring the contents of the refrigerator at the “how to conserve water” display, and shopping in the grocery store. I was laughing when he was at the little Victorian house because inside the house, there is a kitchen table with a small chair. At one point, a little girl came in and took the chair out of the house and into the yard area. Theo watched her from the porch with a curious expression, and when she moved on to play with something else. He trotted out into the yard, picked up the chair, and put it back in the house. As he was doing so, he looked at Chris and me as if to say, “What is she thinking? Chairs belong in the house!” I’m not sure where exactly this sudden interest in putting things away has come from, but I need to foster that and use it to my advantage--ha! (A note about the pictures from the museum--a lot of them are rather fuzzy. I was experimenting with using a higher ISO setting to avoid using flash, and so they didn’t come out nearly as sharp as I would’ve liked. Ah well…)

Sunday morning Auntie Jeanette came over to bring Theo a belated birthday present--a leaf blower, which we shall dub “Blow Blow” to go with his beloved “Mow Mow.” He’s been pushing it around the family room all afternoon, though at the moment he’s not keen on the sound effects--he prefers to say “vroom vroom” himself, rather than hearing the sound it makes!

And we had a “date afternoon” today and went to the movies and lunch while Grandma Diane watched Theo.  We saw “Date Night,” and I laughed so hard at one point that I actually cried. Very funny movie! We stopped at Crush 29 for lunch--it’s a wine bar, but with really good food, too. I had a sausage and pesto pizza and Chris had a bacon-avocado cheeseburger. Delicious!

Since I started this blog with a milestone, let’s end with one too. Theo has added the numbers 2, 3, and 4 to his repertoire. For the longest time, he would count from 5 to 13. Now, randomly, he has added 2 through 4. He’s still opposed to the number 1, apparently. ;-) But what’s really fun is seeing him recognize numbers (and some letters) in random places. At Whole Foods on Friday night, I took him out to the car, and he yelled, “Six!” Now, I’ve discovered that when Theo proclaims something, it probably is indeed in sight. If he says “cat,” there is undoubtedly a cat somewhere, even if no one else would’ve noticed it. So I looked around, and sure enough--there is a 6 in our license plate number. He also pointed out the 2 on our license plate. (The one exception to this rule is giraffes. He frequently announces “Fraff!” when there is no giraffe anywhere in sight. If you’d listen to Theo, there are giraffes randomly roaming the streets of Roseville, and I’m sorry to report that this is actually not the case. But in general, if Theo announces something, it is usually in sight.)

Hope you all have a wonderful week!